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Gay Club. Number's and Friends.

on Wednesday, December 22, 2010
I've been so busy lately. I actually went out the night I posted the last blog. I went to this gay club on the strip. It was so much fun! I got to dance my ass off and was sweating so much but it was worth it. By the end of the night this guy gave me his number and told me he thought I was cute and to "text him" what ever happened to the iconic "call me" line. Kid's these days. lol Well I did text him but to tell you the truth is that if he doesn't make a move nothing is going to happen. I'm not in the mood for a boyfriend right now. I'm just going to be single for now. As far as a friend. Sure! but I'm also not really in the mood for friends right now. lol

You see, I have been working a lot and I love it. My job is really the best one I could ask for in this part of my life. The people that work with my are AMAZING! They are nice and funny and smart. Which is great. Like I said before. It's a fun job and I love it. One of those where I'm pushing myself to get better and better with each day. So far I have been balancing that work/friend thing pretty well. Which means that when I start school soon I will need to juggle work/school and kick out my friends. Which is ok, I'll make do. Education is important to me.

I just woke up from a bad dream a couple hours ago. It was with the girl from the LA trip. For whatever reason she was in it. Her face, her voice, her attitude, and her in general. It sickened me. I wasn't mad that my other friend had "set me up" in the dream so that she would show up. I wasn't hurt like I felt after the trip. It was more of a feeling of disgust. Like she disgusted me. As if someone who killed someone just walked in the room and started high 5'ing people about it. I was repulsed by her presence in my dream. So I woke up and my first thought is "why am I thinking about her" and my second was "because im hanging out with my other friends that hang out with her." Since Lesbian has been in town there has been mentions of the girl in my dream left and right. I really had forgotten about her existence until that point. I didn't care about what has happened to her or if she was still alive. So it's bothering me know that she is now taking over my dream.

So what do I do? First thought was, I need to cut people out more. I love lesbian but if hanging out with her is doing me harm then I need to prioritize my time with her more. Second thought was, fuck people, I just want to be isolated today. You see, I was supposed to hang out with lesbian today. I'm not feeling up to it though. I'm in a pretty off mood after this whole morning. I'm just going to sit in bed all day and watch tv. I'm not in any mood to deal with this bullshit.

As far as moving out of my parents house. It's still happening. I have enough to live ok. I have to budget myself a little but I can make do. It's $500 rent which is good. I'm going to be living with a co-worker that works at a separate store then mine. He is a really cool guy and we have a blast hanging out the few times before and after work that we did. So I'm excited about it all going down. As far as I know now, its still a month or so away from happening. I need to save some more money first. Which is ok with me.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

If you've done the calculations and the bucks work for you - including emergencies here and there that are not regular expenses, then do it! Moving out can be one of the most empowering things a young guy can do, especially if there is a culture clash at home (gay/str8, etc.) I know of guys who moved out, made good, and did fantastically at university, since the living away from 'rents thing prepared them to stand up on their own and be responsible.

Hope it works well for you.

wayner said...

Yeah I know what you mean, sometimes you just o/d on friends and need some time for yourself. We all have the weird/bad dream occasionally and your head-case ex female friend was in it lol. (Shelby?) My favourite dreams are the ones just before I wake up in the morning where I am rolling in the grass under the sun with a naked heavenly guy. That is what I want heaven to be like or what is the sense of existence?
-Be sure to arrange with your parents that you can come home if things don't work out on your own so you can continue with your education. Gawd winter is boring, I have spring-fever already! bfn - Wayne :)

Anonymous said...

happy New Year John, hope you find some time to update your blog.

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