He Is Ignoring Me!

on Wednesday, September 30, 2009
WTF! First of all I found out that everyone and their mothers (literally) knows about Jake.

"You mean Jake?"
ME: "How the hell do you know who I'm talking about?"
"Everyone knows. Its theater."

Really know?? Thats probably why he doesn't text me back! Whatever. I dont care. Im most likely just over reacting. I texted him today... because he never texts me. He never texted back.

I'll write more tonight. I have to go know...

UPDATE: Never mind... he just texted me back. only took him 5 hours.

What A Boring Day.

on Tuesday, September 29, 2009
I stayed home most of the day. I decided not to go to school because I didnt finish any of my homework or projects. So I just went to my last 2 classes. One is government and the other is an elective. So it was a very easy and boring.

My friend blew me off. She was going to come over after school. She told me that she had to go clean because her parents made her. Which is fine. Then I found out she is going to another friends house. Which kinda made me mad but whatever... I'm not gonna flip shit just cause of that.

I'm really exhausted. My body still has not caught up with me after that fast. Either I'm really really hungry or not hungry at all. It's weird.

DID YOU SEE DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES??? omg omg omg. im so excited for this season. im sorry but its sooo much better then glee. Glee doesnt have anything on DH. I love it. That new boy is not cute at all though. Depressing...

So whats going on with Jake??? Idk. I havent talked to him since sunday. I'm waiting for him to make the move. My friend said he is the kind that gets really shy around boys. I dont see that but whatever... Im still going to make him work for it. Is it that hard to send me a text?? Lets see how long I can go waiting.

If anyone wants to trade links I'm up for it! e-mail me: prd2bajew27@yahoo.com

Life Is Good!!

on Monday, September 28, 2009
Sry I didnt post yesterday. Had this whole jewish holiday where I cant do anything. Literally anything. No food, drink, electricity, nothing. Except read. FOR 24 hrs! Yah... not fun but I got to miss school. Its over now so lets talk:

Life has been the best it has been in a long time. I met a cute guy that I cant stop thinking about. I am reconnecting with a bunch of friends that I rifted from a bit last year. I'm doing pretty good in school. Life is nice.

Jake is all I think about. 24/7. I talked to him a bit over text. I dont want to say a lot because that might seem like it was non stop but for the most part I spoke to him all Saturday night and a couple hours sunday before I had to be jewish. He added me on facebook. Which means he searched for me. Well... I cmnted on one of his friends wall so I guess he didnt need to search hard but it still helps to think that he wanted to find me.

Let me describe him since I cant post a picture. He is my hight, about 5' 6". Dirty blond hair. Not to long but not to short. Perfect length. Not skinny but average. He still has braces on but he has the cutest smile. And his personality (OMG!). Its perfect. He is my type 100%. We would make an amazing couple. I just hope that it end up happening haha.

Playing Hard To Get?!?!?

on Saturday, September 26, 2009
OMG!! I think this blog is my lucky charm. I mean I could not find a cute gay guy that was my type at all before this. Then I start it and BOOM. He is there. Perfect in every way. (so far lol) i feel so happy. I cant stop smiling. Let me explain:

Well... I told you I will get to see him today. I did. At first I didnt get to talk to him. Like I saw him but I was busy or he was busy or both. Then luckily on he was at concessions when I went to get water. So I flirted with him and he did back. He was SOO cute. agh! Anyway... I told him he needed to cheer me on when i compete (i feel like im going into way to much detail). Well... let me tell you. He has game. He was flirting with me back and forth but in a very non-obvious way. Like he made it seem as if it was a normal conversation. I on the other hand, was totally obvious and pretty out there. So I asked for his number. He gave it to me. agh! =p

I didnt say bye to him which sucked but kinda worked in my benefit because i had a reason to text him. I HATE TEXTING! Well not really. But texting him i hate. I cant understand him. I made it very obvious that i was flirting. He either missed it or was playing hard to get. Idk.

Well im like in a reck. I have 100 million emotions running thre my head. Idk if he likes me. I mean i think he does. AGH! idk. lol. Well I need to go calm down.

P.s. Im always the one that can read people. Like when people are having relationship problems I can tell them exactly what to say, do, or what the other person feels and be 100% correct. With Jake I cant. Not at all. Ive turned into this mush of nothingness. Everything I know about dating and relationships is gone. Sry this was so long.


Idk when i will get home today so I'm going to make a short one now (in the morning) and then if I have time another short one when I get home tonight.

So I woke up super early. A bunch of us are going to eat breakfast then head down to the conference. Im driving everyone like yesterday. I forgot to tell you the guy's name. His name is Jake. I get to see him today. I'm so excited/nervous. I hope that I dont get all shy around him. I never do but idk I might. I'm also kinda scared that im going to blow it. Like not end up getting his number or not putting myself out there enough. Do you guys get what I'm saying?

Well I'm gonna go get ready. Im SUPER tired. I just got out of bed lol. Coffee is a necessity right now! So pardon my spelling/grammar mistakes lol

OMG! =p I Cant stop smiling.

on Friday, September 25, 2009
First off I want to tell you guys that everything story wise is real. I might change names (including mine) but everything else will be 100% true. K:

So today we did this theater conference thing. It was on the other side of town (yes where i got my brows and hair done lol). So of course there will be gay guys. There were a ton. Last year I did the same conference and there were none! Anyway there was one guy that was SOOO my type. Perfect. I dont know if its something but it definitely could turn into something. Tomorrow is the second part of the conference so i get to see him tomorrow. I heard (threw a friend) that he thinks im "sooo hot!".

AGH! I cant stop smiling. Like you dont get it. It's amazing. I need to get some beauty rest for tomorrow. Im going to dress SOOO good. Agh.

P.s. I know i said i would post pics today but I havent been home since 7am and i JUST got home. Im super tired and had a very long day. So I promise I'll make it up to you guys!!

Home Sweet Home!

on Thursday, September 24, 2009
I've been out of the house all day. CRAZY. From school to going to get a haircut (on the other side of town) then back to school for a theater thing (i run the sound for my school's theater department) and now I'm finally home!

So yah... school was boring today. The cute guy in my government class (the one i sit to the right of) laughed at one of my jokes today. He has an amazing smile. Just so you know ;) Let me try to describe him: He dresses kinda skater but not really brand name stuff. Just plain T's. He wears his jeans low (im guessing he does this so I can check out his ass when i gets up). Dark hair. He is white but he isnt like full on shade of white. Nice tan color. Anyway...

After school I ran home and then left to go get a haircut. I also got my eyebrows done. They look amazing. Then I went to run a show. Like I said above I run sound. There was this guy that is famous on youtube that plays the piano that had a show and I did all that fun stuff. His name is John Shmit. (idk if thats how you spell it). We got free pizza which was cool haha.

I'm so tired so I'm gonna head to sleep. I have a long day tomorrow and lots to write about!! I still havent done any of my hw. Whatever. I'll do it during school haha.

Bye Guys!! <3

Wow... The Power Of Google!

on Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Haha well I'm new at this whole blogger thing. So I didnt know how to get myself out there. I sent an e-mail but other then that I thought I would just wing it. So I have 3 followers and something weird is up with that cause i cant see them and i cant follow other peoples blog whatever to the blog...

Well first lets get this out of the way. Im open to friends. It was hard to come out. First I told a few people I could trust. At first it was this big secret. I would check out guys and i would beat myself up for it. This was all around sophomore year. Anyway it all happened so fast. One person turned into 7 and then it got to the point where it was to much to handle.

Also I had a few friends that couldnt keep there mouths shut. I'll never forgive them for that. It hurts till this day. Its been 2 years and I still look at them and think: "What assholes. How the hell can you look at me with a straight face and lie about what you did." YES! THEY STILL WONT ADMIT IT. but whatever lets move on. I have...

Today at school I saw him. The cutest guy at our school. He is ADORABLE. You have no idea. I saw him more then once to. I thought about bumping into him but he was with a friend (which was a girl. so maybe he is straight?) idk.

Sry this is a long post. Should I make them longer? Cause I have lots to say but i dont want you guys to be bored half way through lol. Let me know =p

I'm Back Love's!

on Monday, September 21, 2009
I can't find a boyfriend. I want one sooo bad. Don't get me wrong. I've been with a guy before. I'm not a virgin at all! I just want an actual relationship with a cute guy that likes me for me and those guys are really really hard to find. Especially at my high school.

So let me break down how my day goes. I wake up the morning and go to school. I dont have a first period because I'm a senior. Nothing exciting really. No cute guys in any of my classes. There is one in my government class and there is another that i walk past every day after government class though. The second one gives me a gay vibe but like I said... I just walk by him lol.

Homecoming is coming up and I really really want to actually take a guy this year. Every year I had to go with one of the girl's. Again... It's hard finding gay boys (that dont dress like woman) at our school.

I could write more but thats it for now!

Love always and forever!!
John Doe!

Im John Doe...

on Sunday, September 20, 2009
I have blogged before but this blog is different. This is my diary. I will be as open as I can get on here. So here is some background...

I'm 17 years old and I live in sin city. I'm a senior this year in high school. All my friends know I'm gay. I don't hide it but I don't flaunt it. My parents know but they don't talk about it. We really haven't had a real conversation about it.

I'm a very normal boy. I don't wear girl's clothes and stuff like that. I do dress amazing though =p. People tell me I'm attractive but i'm self conscious. Well anyway I'm here for me. I will spill my true feeling to you, the Internet. So I hope you like what I have to say/feel.

Tomorrow is Monday and I have school so we will discuss that tomorrow. For now that all. Talk to you soon.

love always and forever!
-John Doe